May 2026: Habits
So. How has your month of May been? Mine has been all over the place – and not just because of the crazy weather here in Manitoba – although that has been a significant part of it. Mid-month, I was prepared to write a blog about a new revelation regarding my neurodivergence – particularly how autistic I really am. However, this past week, I watched a continuing education webinar about social media use called Logging Out or Leaning In – Mental Health Related Consequences of Social Media for Adolescents and You presented by Amori Yee Mikami via my professional association, CCPA.
With the controversy surrounding the upsurge of AI, I found this webinar particularly relevant – and reinforced my decision to use AI as little as possible. However, in today’s online world, it is challenging to determine what is an algorithm-based platform like a search engine and what is artificial-intelligence-produced content – and is there a difference? Organizations in various countries (prompting some to make new laws) have determined that these big tech companies are making apps and platforms with addictive properties geared toward children, let alone adults getting sucked in to click bait and betting apps.
There is no end to greed, it seems. While I have no control over gluttonous corporations, I can choose how to use my devices and to what extent. My particular blend of neurodivergent traits doesn’t find apps, reels, platforms and the like that appealing. I get bored with it pretty quickly. However, I do notice more what provides a dopamine hit and what doesn’t. I don’t know if anyone has done a study on how technology affects neurodivergent brains compared to neurotypical ones; but they are designed to suck you in and keep you engaged.
As the presentation I watched explained, social media has monetized attention. Eyeballs plus interaction equals income. It is no longer simply about connecting with old friends and distant family but has become a regular part of life having been around for approximately 20 years already. A portion of the population doesn’t even know what it’s like to be without technology snuggled in the palm of one’s hand, or available at the flick of a wrist, or embedded in one’s ears. The impact on mental health and development has become a global concern.
I appreciated the practical recommendations made by Amori Mikami. It isn’t about abstaining from social media (although that has limited benefit); it is about choosing how to use it mindfully rather than reflexively. Here are some questions to ask ourselves and/or teach our children/adolescents.
- Am I going on social media as a reflex or am I making an active and informed choice?
- Why do I want to check social media right now?
- Is this a good time and place to check social media?
- What do I want to do on social media?
- Is doing this going to be good for me?
If it is a good time and place, and for a good reason, then go for it. When done for that reason, notice that, and STOP. Get off social media when the reason or goal has been achieved. The challenge for neurodivergent brains is the neurotransmitter dopamine. Often, we get sucked in because it ‘feels good’ due to the hit of dopamine (something our brains lack) and is tricky to quit something stimulating. On the flip side, we can also become overstimulated easily by the content in our feeds, so finding that sweet spot and respecting it isn’t easy.
Good reasons include:
- activities that bring joy or meaning,
- strengthen relationships and connections with people far away,
- social supports.
What makes social media use worse:
- endless scrolling,
- time wasting,
- social comparisons,
- rumination (overthinking),
- isolation,
- not furthering meaningful relationships or connections.
Mikami encourages to make it a family challenge that fosters dialogue: What’s been hard and been easy for you? And to discuss monetized attention and the dilemma that what is viewed could be useful information, but most content providers want your money. Just like watching commercials. We have to be aware of what someone is selling and why. What she calls healthy scepticism.
This actually dovetails with the addiction webinar series I was watching along with a mini-article that I saved for quitting smoking. Once we have determined we are ready to quit the harmful activity (smoking, drinking, scrolling, binge eating etc.), next comes the hard part – dealing with cravings. The article suggests trying the 4 Ds.
Delay – when you feel the urge to participate in the habit you are trying to quit, wait 10 minutes before lighting up, picking up your phone, taking a sip or a bite, etc. and your craving may disappear. From a therapy perspective, this also acts as a way to increase distress tolerance – tolerating the discomfort of your craving a little longer each time.
Distract yourself – try an activity that doesn’t allow you to smoke, drink, access your phone, etc. such as participating in a physical activity, cooking a meal, playing with pets or children – or choosing another source of dopamine like listening to music.
Deep breathing – may help you focus on something other than your harmful habit. It also engages the parasympathetic nervous system for calming or regulating your mind and body. Breathe in through the nose, hold for a moment or two, then exhale through the mouth. Do this three times and check in how your brain and body feels. Keep doing in groups of three until you notice your system slowing down.
Drink water – to help flush nicotine or other toxins out of your system and to keep your mouth busy.
I modified these pointers to be applicable to more than smoking, and I don’t know what magazine I saved this little article out of, but I think it’s worth a try given its similarity and overlap with other coping tools I’ve come across in my line of work. Our brains and bodies will thank us – and maybe our friends and family, too.
Please share any breaking-bad-habit or forming-healthy-habit tips that you have found helpful. While I have to keep my overactive brain from dwelling on the discouraging side of where technology is leading us, I hope I can moderate my use of it and continue making the world a better place just by being in it – which includes releasing what no longer serves me in order to embrace what makes life more fulfilling.
Happy habits to you all! 😉